Written on July 14th, 2010
Since the rains really started to fall at the end of June almost everyday my compound empties out from about 8:30 am to 12:30 pm as everyone goes to work in the fields. In my village the main crops are groundnuts and coos (a type of millet-like grain). For the first few weeks only Baay Waly and the boys went to plow and sow the seeds but now that seedlings are beginning to pop up everyone goes out to weed and hoe. Today that included me.
Now that school has finished I'm much less busy with health lessons and peer health club meetings so why not spend the morning "working the land"?
Baay Waly's coos fields are about 1/2 kilometer outside of KJJ so after breakfast Yaay Amie and I walked into the bush. Once at the fields we all spent the morning bent over at the waist weeding and thinning the coos. For the record coos and grass/weeds looks exactly the same so in my mind this was not an easy process. As usual I was quickly deemed slow and incompetent so my host brother Ous had to lead me up and down the rows saying "Ramatoulie start here." While Alhagie walked beside me assessing and correcting my work. "Ramatoulie, get rid of this. Leave this. Reduce this. NO!!! Don't get rid of that, that's coos"
It was a beautiful day with a blue blue sky, white white clouds and green green fields and trees. I realize that I had the luxury of reveling in all this beauty because I will not be going to work in the fields everyday for the next few months. But nevertheless it was a nice day to be out in the bush.
We worked for about three hours pausing every so often to squat in the shade. After about an hour consensus was reached that I knew how to farm. Phew! I was relieved to know that at least for today I was considered a productive member of the family. After three hours of running after Ous I was told that I needed to rest and was sent to collect bissap leaves for the sauce for lunch. Upon returning I found some very antsy host siblings sitting in the shade of the donkey cart, so what's a good toubab to do? Teach them a song of course! So I proceeded to translate and sing "Old McDonald had a farm" in Wolof. The "eeyah-eeyah-oh!" was every ones favorite part and Yaay Amie even joined in the fun at one point doing a killer impression of a goat. So that was my day on Baay Waly's farm.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Big Love: The Gambia
Written on June 28th, 2010
A few weeks ago I was talking on the phone to someone from home about my host family and she exclaimed, "I never realized you have two host moms" implying that she didn't realize that I live in a polygamous family. So yes folks, I have two moms, Yaay Amie and Yaay Sarjo. Yaay Amie is Baay Waly's first wife and she has four kids. Yaay Sarjo is his second wife and she has five kids but Yaay Sarjo's oldest is probably around 15 so its safe to say that my family has been a big happy family for a while now and has thus had a while to figure out how to live harmoniously.
The fact that my friend hadn't realized that my family was polygamous caused me to consider how, if at all, my life here is affected by this fact. The answer is not a whole hell of a lot, which is probably why I never thought to mention it before. From afar, coming from an American cultural context, it was very difficult for me to imagine living in a polygamous family and furthermore to imagine that I would mostly have positive things to say about it.
First, polygamy is common in the Gambia. According to Islam a man can have up to four wives. Here, it seems to me, the norm is about two. In my village if a man has multiple wives he has two, I can think of some with three and only a handful who have four.
Husband and wife relations here are very different than in America. This is a conservative, patriarchal society so the women are the "work horses" of the family, they cook, clean, raise the children and farm on top of that. The men are responsible, in theory, for financially supporting the family and they are the decision makers. Men and women don't share the same house or bed here and as for sexual rights men hold all the cards.
Due to the women's role in the family polygamy can actually end up being a benefit because having a co-wife means splitting all the work. In my family Yaay Sarjo and Yaay Amie alternate cooking so they only have to cook every other day. If one of them has to do something the other person can pick up the slack. For example, right now Yaay Amie has gone to Senegal for a week to attend her younger sisters wedding/naming ceremony. This is only possible because Yaay Sarjo is still here. For now Yaay Amie is mostly the only one to enjoy this benefit of polygamy because Yaay Sarjo has a ten month old baby but as they get older I think they both will be able to start attending programs out of town. In other compounds this division of labor also holds true and in most compounds there is so much extended family living together that work is split between the multiple wives of multiple husbands.
I think its important to note that my positive view of polygamy, expressed here, mostly comes from the fact that my two moms get along really well. As time goes on I realize more and more what wonderful people Yaay Amie and Yaay Sarjo are. They are kind, considerate and powerful in their own unique ways. They get along because it seems that first, they are friends, second,they help each other and third, they have some groups of friends that are the same and some that are different so they're not constantly together. The other weekend Yaay Amie's friend in Kuntair had an engagement ceremony and Yaay Sarjo and I went with her and spent the day at the program. Because we were gone all day we brought the baby, Mam Goor, with us and throughout the day I was touched by how Yaay Amie made sure Yaay Sarjo was doing OK by helping with Mam Goor and keeping us all fed and full of attaya.
Now, though I think polygamy works well in my family, I am in no way jumping on the bandwagon. As I frequently say, when turning down marriage proposals from already married men, "If I only get to have one husband, my husband only gets to have one wife." My number one problem with polygamy is that it represents an overarching societal patriarchy. Women here are not equal to men and do not have very many personal freedoms. From the time they are girls they have very little agency in deciding how they live their lives or spend their time. The fact that most Gambian women lack these freedoms and human rights can be difficult for me to observe on a daily basis. But this shouldn't lead you to believe that Gambian women are weak, rather they are very strong and from my perspective its because they find contentment within their situation. If you're going to have a co-wife you might as well try to be friends with her and in that friendship something beautiful and powerful can be found.
A few weeks ago I was talking on the phone to someone from home about my host family and she exclaimed, "I never realized you have two host moms" implying that she didn't realize that I live in a polygamous family. So yes folks, I have two moms, Yaay Amie and Yaay Sarjo. Yaay Amie is Baay Waly's first wife and she has four kids. Yaay Sarjo is his second wife and she has five kids but Yaay Sarjo's oldest is probably around 15 so its safe to say that my family has been a big happy family for a while now and has thus had a while to figure out how to live harmoniously.
The fact that my friend hadn't realized that my family was polygamous caused me to consider how, if at all, my life here is affected by this fact. The answer is not a whole hell of a lot, which is probably why I never thought to mention it before. From afar, coming from an American cultural context, it was very difficult for me to imagine living in a polygamous family and furthermore to imagine that I would mostly have positive things to say about it.
First, polygamy is common in the Gambia. According to Islam a man can have up to four wives. Here, it seems to me, the norm is about two. In my village if a man has multiple wives he has two, I can think of some with three and only a handful who have four.
Husband and wife relations here are very different than in America. This is a conservative, patriarchal society so the women are the "work horses" of the family, they cook, clean, raise the children and farm on top of that. The men are responsible, in theory, for financially supporting the family and they are the decision makers. Men and women don't share the same house or bed here and as for sexual rights men hold all the cards.
Due to the women's role in the family polygamy can actually end up being a benefit because having a co-wife means splitting all the work. In my family Yaay Sarjo and Yaay Amie alternate cooking so they only have to cook every other day. If one of them has to do something the other person can pick up the slack. For example, right now Yaay Amie has gone to Senegal for a week to attend her younger sisters wedding/naming ceremony. This is only possible because Yaay Sarjo is still here. For now Yaay Amie is mostly the only one to enjoy this benefit of polygamy because Yaay Sarjo has a ten month old baby but as they get older I think they both will be able to start attending programs out of town. In other compounds this division of labor also holds true and in most compounds there is so much extended family living together that work is split between the multiple wives of multiple husbands.
I think its important to note that my positive view of polygamy, expressed here, mostly comes from the fact that my two moms get along really well. As time goes on I realize more and more what wonderful people Yaay Amie and Yaay Sarjo are. They are kind, considerate and powerful in their own unique ways. They get along because it seems that first, they are friends, second,they help each other and third, they have some groups of friends that are the same and some that are different so they're not constantly together. The other weekend Yaay Amie's friend in Kuntair had an engagement ceremony and Yaay Sarjo and I went with her and spent the day at the program. Because we were gone all day we brought the baby, Mam Goor, with us and throughout the day I was touched by how Yaay Amie made sure Yaay Sarjo was doing OK by helping with Mam Goor and keeping us all fed and full of attaya.
Now, though I think polygamy works well in my family, I am in no way jumping on the bandwagon. As I frequently say, when turning down marriage proposals from already married men, "If I only get to have one husband, my husband only gets to have one wife." My number one problem with polygamy is that it represents an overarching societal patriarchy. Women here are not equal to men and do not have very many personal freedoms. From the time they are girls they have very little agency in deciding how they live their lives or spend their time. The fact that most Gambian women lack these freedoms and human rights can be difficult for me to observe on a daily basis. But this shouldn't lead you to believe that Gambian women are weak, rather they are very strong and from my perspective its because they find contentment within their situation. If you're going to have a co-wife you might as well try to be friends with her and in that friendship something beautiful and powerful can be found.
World Cup!
Written on June 26th, 2010
So tonight was the "Group of 16" World Cup game between the USA and Ghana. I went to Kerr Omar today to work on a project proposal with Asso and Mamet but made it very clear that I needed to be back to KJJ before the game. So at 6:30 I made my way over to the skills center where myself and most of the KJJ male population between the ages of 12 and 45 crowded around the tiny TV. The second I walked in it was very clear that no one was going to take toubab pity on me and support USA to make me feel better. Once Ghana scored in the first ten minutes all hopes of building some base of support for myself within the group was shot. After the first half when we were still down 1-0 Mr. Sanyand, the nursery school teacher, looked at me with deep pity in his eyes and told me "not to be sad." It was interesting because until then I hadn't really thought about how they were perceiving my cheering. I think that my presence is so strange (women never ever attend the matches) and the fact that I know anything/follow football is so unexpected that they assume I am a huge devotee rather than the textbook definition of a fair-weather fan. In addition however I was surprised at the surge of nationalism I felt after we equalized in the second half. Being away from the US in a place like this, representing America as a Peace Corps volunteer definitely makes me watch a game like this much differently than I would in the US. When I talked to my Mom briefly today she told me that they probably would watch and not root for America and I thought, "If I was home that probably would be me too."
After the pain of 90 minutes in an ever growing group of Gambian men with ever increasing levels of rowdiness I still had to sit through the 30 minute extra time. When Ghana scored at the beginning the room erupted in screaming, clapping and dancing and all I could think was, it sucks that were losing but witnessing this explosion of joy makes it totally worth it. As I walked home under the full moon to the calls of victory and apology I was a little sad (but I'm a Red Sox fan so I can handle it) but mostly excited that I would get to see Ghana continue to represent Africa in Africa's World Cup while living in an African village.
[As I type this now, last night Ghana lost to Uruguay in shoot outs. It was very disappointing. Since I was in Kombo I got to watch the match on a huge projector screen at a bar in Kombo. Right after the end of regulation time a huge storm hit and the satellite power cut out. We had to run four blocks in the pouring rain to get a taxi to go back and watch the conclusion of the match at the small Lebanese restaurant around the corner from the Peace Corps House. Needless to say the drizzling rain matched our moods afterwards.]
So tonight was the "Group of 16" World Cup game between the USA and Ghana. I went to Kerr Omar today to work on a project proposal with Asso and Mamet but made it very clear that I needed to be back to KJJ before the game. So at 6:30 I made my way over to the skills center where myself and most of the KJJ male population between the ages of 12 and 45 crowded around the tiny TV. The second I walked in it was very clear that no one was going to take toubab pity on me and support USA to make me feel better. Once Ghana scored in the first ten minutes all hopes of building some base of support for myself within the group was shot. After the first half when we were still down 1-0 Mr. Sanyand, the nursery school teacher, looked at me with deep pity in his eyes and told me "not to be sad." It was interesting because until then I hadn't really thought about how they were perceiving my cheering. I think that my presence is so strange (women never ever attend the matches) and the fact that I know anything/follow football is so unexpected that they assume I am a huge devotee rather than the textbook definition of a fair-weather fan. In addition however I was surprised at the surge of nationalism I felt after we equalized in the second half. Being away from the US in a place like this, representing America as a Peace Corps volunteer definitely makes me watch a game like this much differently than I would in the US. When I talked to my Mom briefly today she told me that they probably would watch and not root for America and I thought, "If I was home that probably would be me too."
After the pain of 90 minutes in an ever growing group of Gambian men with ever increasing levels of rowdiness I still had to sit through the 30 minute extra time. When Ghana scored at the beginning the room erupted in screaming, clapping and dancing and all I could think was, it sucks that were losing but witnessing this explosion of joy makes it totally worth it. As I walked home under the full moon to the calls of victory and apology I was a little sad (but I'm a Red Sox fan so I can handle it) but mostly excited that I would get to see Ghana continue to represent Africa in Africa's World Cup while living in an African village.
[As I type this now, last night Ghana lost to Uruguay in shoot outs. It was very disappointing. Since I was in Kombo I got to watch the match on a huge projector screen at a bar in Kombo. Right after the end of regulation time a huge storm hit and the satellite power cut out. We had to run four blocks in the pouring rain to get a taxi to go back and watch the conclusion of the match at the small Lebanese restaurant around the corner from the Peace Corps House. Needless to say the drizzling rain matched our moods afterwards.]
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
